


The Feeling's Right

by PFDiva



Category: The Penumbra Podcast
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, i am here to provide, i blame the tpp discord, modern au because fuck mars but also fuck second citadel, tpp needs more femslash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-02
Updated: 2017-10-02
Packaged: 2019-01-08 03:44:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12246336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PFDiva/pseuds/PFDiva
Summary: Sir Caroline and Rita are just each others' type, or what happens when the unstoppable fluff meets the immovable womanizer.





	The Feeling's Right

Damien doesn't look up at the sound of the car door opening, just wails "RILLA~!" to the sky as if his heart is breaking. Damien is the client. Technically. He said his fiance went missing a month ago, had been kidnapped by a cad, and he was so distraught over her that Rita insisted they HAD to help him. Mr. Steel agreed because he was still beat up about his boyfriend having to travel for work.

 

Damien's fiance, a Doctor Amaryllis, turned out to have been in a different state for work with Arum, who'd accompanied her back. Neither was explaining Arum's connection, but his silk shirts and shiny shoes were in stark contrast to Doctor Amaryllis's ratty t-shirt and grungy sweatpants, so Rita's money is on...money.

 

"Damien, I'm here!" exclaims Doctor Amaryllis as she climbs out of the car, sounding both fond and annoyed, the way Mr. Steel does when Rita’s chatter actually helps him figure something out.

 

"Oh, it's almost as if I can hear her voice, Angelo!"

 

"You can, Damien--look!" Angelo gives Damien what looks like a very painful jostling, though Damien doesn't seem phased. Angelo is Damien's friend, a massive bear of a man. Without him, Rita wouldn't have understood Damien's sobbing well enough to convince Mr. Steel that they needed to find Damien's fiancee. Both men are sitting outside of Second Citadel Security in their uniforms, and while Rita's not usually into white guys with more beard than face, even she is taking a second look at Angelo. It's the uniform, she decides. She's a sucker for a body in uniform.

 

When Damien looks at Angelo, Angelo points at Doctor Amaryllis, who is striding their way. Damien gasps and looks as though he is going to faint before jumping up and sweeping Doctor Amaryllis into his arms. She laughs as he swings her around in a wide circle, her long braid whipping out behind her as she embraces him.

 

Damien hastily sets Doctor Amaryllis down and babbles apologies that she seems disinclined to listen to, then insists he must speak his heart.

 

"Must you, honeysuckle?" asks Arum, finally reaching the pair. What follows could be very aggressive flirting or a very amorous argument. Rita can't decide and she can't stick around because Mr. Steel is now pulling her inside the building. They're apparently following Angelo. Damn that uniform because he has a nice ass.

 

There is definitely an argument happening inside the building, with an accented woman's voice insisting that "Damien is completely useless right now anyway!" and another, unaccented woman's voice arguing, "Last I recall, I was the one in charge here!" The unaccented voice turns out to belong to an african hijabi lady in a patterned orange dress with a black cardigan and a matching orange headscarf. The accented voice belongs to a short-haired black woman who fills out her Second Citadel Security uniform VEEEEEEEEERY nicely, in Rita’s not so humble opinion.

 

The women are arguing across a long meeting table and the hijabi lady, a Miss Mira, sighs in annoyance at the sight of Angelo, Steel, and Rita. Steel quickly goes to her to discuss settling the bill. She's offered to pay Mr. Steel's fees for Damien, and Rita already has all her credit card information at the office, but it's always best to let the client know what charges they're going to be responsible for in total. No one likes to be surprised.

 

While they do that, Rita takes a second look at the lady in the uniform, and the lady looks right back. When their eyes meet, she grins wide and wolfish. Rita's heart skips a beat in her chest and her feet move before her brain. Which means that when she gets to the lady, she has no idea what to say beyond, "Hahahahiiii~"

 

"Ello, luv. Aren't you the buffest gal I've seen since I got here?"

 

"I'm not buff!" Rita objects, a little alarmed, "If anything, YOU'RE the buff one!" This makes the woman look smug until Rita continues, "EVERYONE here is buff, I've never seen so many buff people in one spot, it's kind of unfair, though it makes sense since this IS a security place--!"

 

"Everyone?"

 

"Well, not Doctor Amaryllis. She's awful pretty, but she's not really buff, I guess." The woman dissolves into laughter and Rita is offended, "Hey! I didn't say anything funny and I don't appreciate you laughing at me like this--"

 

"I'm not laughing at you," the other woman replies, even though it looks and sounds an awful lot like she is. "I'm not American and where I'm from, buff means pretty. I think you're a right pretty gal."

 

"Oh." Rita is abashed now.

 

"Yeah." The lady looks so pleased. Rita can't think of anything to say for a moment and she just enjoys that attractive face. Then she thinks of something to say.

 

"Where are you from?"

 

"Wales."

 

"I like your accent."

 

"Most girls do."

 

"And your muscles."

 

"You wanna see more?"

 

Rita is looking at those powerful shoulders and darned straight she would like to see more but: "I'm not sure your boss would appreciate you just stripping at work--ohhh." The woman gave Rita that wolfish grin again and Rita's stomach turns to something liquid and hot and it's definitely not the Jimmy John's she had for lunch.

 

"I don't even know your name!"

 

"Sir Caroline. What's yours, luv?"

 

"SIR Caroline? Like a knight?"

 

"Got knighted in England by the queen herself. Earned that sir, I did."

 

"I'm just Rita, I'm not a knight or anything, I don't think I could even be a knight, isn't that really hard--?"

 

"That mouth of yours sure is something," Sir Caroline chuckles, and it doesn't feel like mockery at all. Rita curves herself invitingly towards Sir Caroline.

 

"I could show you what else it does."

 

Sir Caroline puts an arm around Rita's waist and murmurs in her ear, "I was hoping you might, luv. Your boss isn't going to need you, is he?" Rita looks up and finds Mr. Steel giving Angelo the sort of horrified look he gives Mick Mercury when Mick shows up at the office. She can see why. Angelo talks with his hands just like Mick, and he's got a big voice too. Mira looks very annoyed.

 

"Nahhh," Rita assures Sir Caroline. He's a big boy. He can take care of himself. "But aren't you at work?"

 

"I was actually arguing shift schedule with Mira, but I think I'll let Angelo have it. Angelo! ANGELO!!"

 

Angelo looks up in surprise and the look on Sir Caroline's face has become truly venomous, though he doesn't seem to notice. "You can HAVE the shift--I don't want it. I have more PRESSING matters to attend." She gives Rita a squeeze and Rita finds herself categorically incapable of suppressing her filthiest giggle. She's gonna get laid!

 

Mr. Steel, of course, is thrown off and protests, but Rita tosses him the car keys and leaves with Sir Caroline. The next thing Rita knows, she's in an apartment that looks like the "before" in a crime show like CSI or Criminal Minds. She says as much, which makes Sir Caroline laugh.

 

"I'm not a murderer luv--"

 

"You know, that is EXACTLY the sort of thing murderer would say--"

 

"And if you're done being paranoid, I'd like to eat you out."

 

That takes the wind right out of Rita's sails.

 

"Okay."

 

Sir Caroline doesn't start there, of course. She starts by kissing Rita so tenderly, Rita can't help but melt into her. Sir Caroline is only a little taller than Rita, but her hands end up on Rita's hips, while Rita's arms go around Sir Caroline's neck.

 

When she is done thoroughly turning Rita into mush via kissing, Sir Caroline's hands slide under the hem of Rita's shirt to caress the soft rolls of flesh there. This worries Rita enough that she breaks the kiss to demand, "You're not one of those weirdos who's going to spend forever touching my flab and not get to touching any of the good bits, are you? Because if you are, we're stopping RIGHT HERE, missy!"

 

Sir Caroline looks amused and a little thrown off, but she gamely responds. "I just want to get my hands on your body, luv. I like that it's a very round body but I promise that I'll spend a very normal amount of time touching your flab. Can I do that or will we have a problem?"

 

"No problem, just checking." Rita pulls Sir Caroline back in to resume kissing. Sir Caroline spends a very normal amount of time touching Rita's flab, her fingers lightly caressing in the sensitive creases before moving to draw lines of sensation up Rita's back on either side of her spine. Rita tangles her fingers into the curls at the back of Sir Caroline's head, massaging her neck and shoulders and eliciting the most delicious moan in response.

 

Rita's bra suddenly goes loose, and Rita giggles into Sir Caroline's jaw. "I suppose we should be moving this to the bedroom about now?"

 

"I suppose you're right," Sir Caroline agrees, her voice low and raw. Her hands sweep down Rita's back, over her ass to grab her thighs. Before Rita knows what's happening, she's being lifted off her feet so that her thighs can wrap around Sir Caroline's waist. Rita yelps and gapes down at Sir Caroline, who looks SO smug, damn her. Rita is unbearably aroused already, and she clings.

 

Sir Caroline carries Rita through the apartment with no apparent strain, tumbling Rita onto a large, comfortable bed and kissing her senseless. When Rita comes back to herself, Sir Caroline has already removed Rita's shoes, socks, and is kissing the inside of Rita's ankle with intent. It should not feel that good, but Sir Caroline's eyes are smoldering and the kiss runs through Rita like electricity.

 

"Ohh, Sir Caroline~!"

 

Sir Caroline kisses her way up the inside of Rita's leg, making Rita's toes curl with anticipation. When she reaches the soft flesh on the inside of Rita's thigh, she nibbles Just Hard Enough that Rita wails and shudders, already on the verge. Of course, Sir Caroline then refuses to go any higher, and works Rita's panties off, kissing her way down the inside of Rita's other leg. Her lips are soft, in contrast to her everything else, and Rita lets out a desperate sob, wanting so much she's liable to cry of it.

 

"Shh, don't be like that, luv. You can hold out for me a little, can't you? For me?" Rita nods, helpless in Sir Caroline's hands, and she gets a warm smile for her efforts. "There's a good girl, see? Now I've got the hard part, why not finish getting undressed, hm?" Rita's not eager to move at all, but when Sir Caroline begins to strip as well, she decides that she can sure as skippy do so as well. Rita scoots up the bed to pull off her shirt and bra, tossing both aside before shedding her skirt onto the floor.

 

By the time Rita has finished, Sir Caroline is gloriously naked as well, and Rita's first impressions of strength and power were very correct. Her muscles have muscles, she has a six-pack and long, incredible legs. Rita feels dizzy just looking. She's more than used to admiring such pretty people from something more of a distance, but having one in her bed (Or being in their bed, as the case may be) is a novelty extraordinaire. Rita spends long moments admiring Sir Caroline, only to realize that Sir Caroline is admiring her right back. Rita can't help a repeat of her greeting giggle and Sir Caroline apparently can't help but join Rita in bed.

 

She climbs on top of Rita, one leg between Rita's thighs, the wet heat of her sex grinding against Rita's thigh. It is so good that Rita is briefly overwhelmed with sensation. Her thigh is hard and hot between Rita's, and the evidence of her desire makes for a heady mix of smug satisfaction and liquid electricity. Fortunately for Rita, Sir Caroline has this well in hand, and the kissing immediately recommences. The kissing is also accompanied by some really amazing grinding, which gets slicker and hotter the more they move together.

 

When Sir Caroline begins kissing her way up Rita's jaw and down her throat, Rita begins feeling like she's not contributing to this whole endeavor nearly as much as she probably should and begins feeling around for Sir Caroline's nipples. Her chest is very muscular and doesn't have much in the way of breasts, so her nipples are WONDERFULLY easy to find. It helps that Rita knows where nipples are supposed to be. They grow hard as Rita gives them a tweak. The soft growl muffled against Rita's neck makes Rita shiver, a giggle caught in her throat because Sir Caroline is far cuter than Rita expected her to be.

 

Sir Caroline gives in and moans, loud in Rita's ear, when Rita tweaks her nipples again. So Rita keeps doing it. She really should expect it when Sir Caroline returns the favor, but she’s distracted, and cries out when Sir Caroline’s hand finds a way to her chest. Desperately, Rita tries to lock her ankles around Sir Caroline's leg because she just needs a little more stimulation and she will be _there_.

 

Sir Caroline, the tease, breaks away, kissing her way down Rita's chest to give each of her nipples a suckle and a nip. That's very nearly it for Rita, or it would be if Caroline would just get some something between her thighs! "If you don't get your fingers in me RIGHT now--" Rita begins a huffy threat that warbles off into a moan when Sir Caroline smugly scrapes teeth over her nipple.

 

"What was that, luv?"

 

"Ohh, you're evil incarnate! The devil herself!"

 

Sir Caroline chuckled wickedly, "The devil WISHES he could be as ferocious as me…!"

 

"You PROMISED," Rita whines, and Sir Caroline concedes that with a laugh. It takes an almost embarrassingly short time before Rita is climaxing, Sir Caroline's tongue tracing patterns into her clit, two fingers curving deep inside of her. It's been an AWFUL long time since Rita's been with anybody and Sir Caroline's been teasing her for what feels like forever. Rita refuses to be embarrassed.

 

When Rita catches her breath, Sir Caroline is laying next to her, licking the fingers that had been inside Rita and looking as smug as ever. Rita messily kisses Sir Caroline around those fingers, tasting herself and loving it. Of course Rita returns the favor, putting her face between Sir Caroline's thighs, licking and sucking until Sir Caroline demands a finger, then begs for it when Rita will not relent. Rita drives Sir Caroline to orgasm with her fingers and tongue and relishes every second of it. Who doesn't like having a pretty girl under them, screaming their name?

 

Sometimes later, as the two are lying in Sir Caroline's bed together, Rita remembers that she can't nap here, because her hair will dry out and get impossibly tangled. She starts to sit up with a sad sigh, only for Sir Caroline's hand on her elbow to pull her up short.

 

"Leaving so soon, luv? I haven't even bought you dinner yet."

 

"I can't," Rita replied mournfully , "My hair."

 

"Satin pillowcases, luv. Didn't you notice?" Rita hadn't, and she touches said pillowcases to confirm. "Come back. We'll have us a nap, then get cleaned up and go for a steak, eh? You have the big ones here in America, don'tcha?"

 

Rita slowly sank back down and nodded, "Well, you all have such tiny meal portions across the pond..!" Sir Caroline laughs, and puts an arm around Rita's waist, pulling Rita close for cuddling. They fall asleep together like that.

**Author's Note:**

> God bless my amazing betas, but I was the last to touch this, so all mistakes are my own. Also, I can't believe I've made the only content for this pairing in existence. Here's hoping I start a trend.


End file.
